Out in the Open
by Faye-Naruse
Summary: When Nowaki collapses, Hiroki makes a confession. Egoist!fluff.


Out in the Open

"Hiro-san..." Nowaki murmured against Hiroki's skin as he leaned over him, trailing lips down a heaving chest. He slipped curious fingers beneath the hem of Hiroki's shirt as he gently nipped at a spot just below Hiroki's waistband.

Hiroki attempted to get his breathing under control. He closed his eyes, let the feeling of Nowaki pressing against him sink in. He reached for him, cupping his cheeks in his palms. He could feel Nowaki's heat: his fingers were hot, his breath was hot, his face was…a little too hot?

"Nowaki?" Hiroki's eyebrows shot up in surprise. He felt Nowaki's forehead with the back of his hand. "You're burning up!"

"Ah, sorry, Hiro-san, I don't seem to be able to..." Nowaki didn't finish his sentence, slumping over to the side.

"Nowaki? N-Nowaki!"

* * *

Nowaki blinked blearily, feeling lightheaded. His surroundings became familiar as his eyes adjusted to the lack of light. His and Hiroki's bedroom was dark except for what was filtering in through the door cracked slightly ajar.

"You awake now?" Hiroki aske quietly from the edge of the bed.

Nowaki sat up. "Hiro-san, I'm sorry-"

"Don't-!" Hiroki half-yelled before stopping himself and clearing his throat. He crossed his arms. "D-Don't sit up so fast."

"Hiro-san?"

Hiroki looked away. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm a little hotter than usual but otherwise okay," Nowaki said slowly.

"Good, it's just a fever then."

"Hiro-san?" Nowaki repeated uncertainly. He watched Hiroki glance up at him then, cheeks filling with red, scoot closer and lean forward. Was he imagining Hiroki's trembling? Their lips grazed with the lightest touch.

Hiroki suddenly stood, quickly moving away from the bed, but Nowaki grabbed his wrist. When their eyes met, Hiroki grimaced.

"You're acting strangely, Hiro-san. What is it?" Nowaki said, his voice laced in concern.

Hiroki sighed and hesitantly sat back down. "It's just, I don't know, you scared me. I'm shaken up, but it's irrational, really."

"I-I'm sorry, I-"

"Stop apologizing! You don't even know what you're apologizing for," Hiroki said, shaking his head. He exhaled. "I don't want to talk about it."

"About…what, Hiro-san?"

"Nothing!" Hiroki growled.

Nowaki released Hiroki's wrist like he had been burned. He looked away. His blank expression slowly began to crumble as he fiddled with the folds in his bedsheets, crestfallen.

"Come on, d-don't look like that. I didn't mean to snap at you," Hiroki said quickly. But Nowaki couldn't help it. He didn't understand Hiroki's reaction, and it scared him. They were too happy, and he had known it…

"Nowaki, don't, I-"

"Hiro-san, I don't understand. So _help_ me understand!" Nowaki said, sounding desperate.

Hiroki flinched at his tone. A long moment passed in which they simply stared at one another.

"Fine!" Hiroki finally conceded. "Just…don't laugh at me."

Nowaki nodded.

"I know you take safety precautions, I know, but it all still s-scares me."

"What scares you?" Nowaki lifted a confused brow.

"You treat sick patients all day! Sometimes I just worry that one of them has contracted some horrible, contagious disease and you get it and, and you just...you don't come back to me." Hiroki bit his lip to shut himself up, cheeks flushed. His pride would allow him to say nothing more.

Nowaki took it all in with wide eyes. Hiroki had been worrying like this? About this? For how long? He had had no idea.

"I don't know what to say, Hiro-san..."

His stomach twisted silently in guilt, but he was also secretly glad that his fears were not confirmed. He couldn't remember the last time he had been so happy to be wrong.

Hiroki continued, "Which is exactly why I didn't want to tell you! It's pointless worrying on my part, b-but I can't stop myself."

"It's not...pointless, Hiro-san. In a way, it makes me happy to hear you worry about me so much. B-but!" Nowaki added swiftly, grabbing the brunet's wrist when he looked like about ready to flee the room, "Hiro-san, I'm tougher than I think you realize. Nothing can take me away from you that easily. Okay?"

Nowaki chuckled when he saw that Hiroki was still frowning. Not too long ago, Hiroki would have hid under the blankets in embarrassment at the thought of admitting such candid thoughts. Considering how far they'd come from their clumsy beginning, it pleased Nowaki to have Hiroki share this vulnerability with him.

Eyes locked, he pulled him to him by the hand, guiding him closer. Hiroki sunk into the bed on his stomach, the air in his lungs escaping in a small sigh.

Nowaki turned his head and, pushing himself up by their intertwined fingers, kissed the shell of Hiroki's ear.

"I love you and I _always_ will, Hiro-san." He rested his head on Hiroki's shoulder, curling towards him.

Hiroki simply closed his eyes and let Nowaki hold him.


End file.
